optimized-results.com

The Treasure Trove Within, part II

ianb — Sun, 01 Aug 2010 07:23:38 +0000

In using your natural resources (The Treasure Trove Within) to further yourself in life, it’s imperative to your success that you’re looking in the right treasure chest. Using someone else’s natural resources won’t work. This is why I use the Enneagram as an initial assessment tool in my coaching programs. Accurately assessing your type on the Enneagram (the lens through which we see the world around us, take in, and sort stimuli) is very powerful. The consequences of being mis-typed by yourself or anyone else are at the least time-wasters, and potentially self-defeating.
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The Treasure Trove Within

ianb — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 06:01:28 +0000

A wildly misleading trend causing undue stress needs to be stopped. There are countless gurus standing up and telling us to “be like me, do as I say,” as they are “successful, have all the answers,” and so on. The truth is, that what may work for me, may not work for you. We’re not the same people. If everyone was like Dr. Phil, Anthony Robbins, or Oprah, then doing exactly what they say and modeling your way of being in the world after them would make sense. But even those three people are so different, who do you listen to? (more…)

Security and Defenses = waste of time.

ianb — Sat, 05 Jun 2010 04:18:42 +0000

Security is basically a mental construct; in reality there’s no such thing. The real world is filled with brain embolisms, cancer, drunk drivers, people changing their minds or lying, etc. We invented the concept of “security” in our brains, which creates an alternate environment to reality because reality scares us. tough s___ really, cuz we’re stuck with it. :-> We can take precautions to mitigate bodily harm (don’t walk across freeways) but after that,

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The Fastest Route to Your Best Life is a Spiral

ianb — Mon, 31 May 2010 21:45:23 +0000

The Spiral: our most ancient and perfect symbol/model of Life itself. The simplest and most profound within One structure - One form. Progress/progression is marked by Include and Transcend the area preceding. When we extrapolate, the Spiral also offers what is not Natural to Life: doubling back, second-guessing, tangents.

When we can live an Integral Life: following this model of Life/Reality itself, we Include and Transcend as we Progress. We don’t divert from the Path to go backward, stop moving, or go off on tangents. We don’t create a digital construct of 0s and 1s where we separate ourselves from Nature (thus each other.) We relax

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Why Do I Have to Go First?

ianb — Sun, 02 May 2010 06:11:00 +0000

Throughout my consulting and coaching practice, I’ve put the onus on my clients to strive for understanding others, have compassion for others, and to see the world through other’s eyes. Recently, someone asked some questions that raised an interesting point:

“Why should I take the first step, or make the first move? Why do I have to understand their way of seeing things? Why can’t they try to understand me the way I say things? Why can’t they just see it my way?

”There are many ways to look at this, but one thing you can count on is that you could wait a long time for the other person to make the first move, and it may not happen.

The ritual of holding out one’s empty “weapon hand,” which is how the handshake originated, has become so unconscious that we’ve forgotten how “going first” has always been our way of initiating interaction. (more…)

Walking a Mile in Someone Else’s Shoes Can Get You Lost

ianb — Fri, 02 Apr 2010 23:47:59 +0000

Most of us have been taught that in order to have compassion for someone, or understand their actions, we need to walk a mile in their shoes. Then we’d understand why they do what they do or say what they say. Actually, that’s not altogether true.

We go into situations with our own beliefs, values, and perspectives, whether those situations are ours or someone else’s. Stepping into their situation (walking in their shoes) with our own beliefs, values, and perspectives, is in no way having the same experience as they would have. We’re not only fooling ourselves, but probably going down the wrong road as well. (more…)

The Owl and the Ostrich

ianb — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 00:30:21 +0000

The Ostrich and the Owl represent two very different approaches to life. The ostrich is known for hiding his head when sensing trouble, much like a small child hiding his face behind his hands. The rationale being “if I can’t see you, you can’t see me.”

As we get older, we learn that doesn’t work, yet often continue to apply that philosophy to our jobs and lives. We feel as though if we don’t look at something disturbing, it won’t get to us. On the other hand, the owl has phenomenal sight, and rotates her head almost all the way around like a radar dish, to pick up every bit of information available. Although she doesn’t have to act on everything she sees, no opportunity gets by her either. (more…)

Communication Actions for Optimized Results

ianb — Mon, 22 Feb 2010 06:00:17 +0000

Action Steps for Success
There are steps you can take right now, that will help you achieve success with less stress and more joy. They don’t require any expense, and they’re within your grasp. These four communication shifts have turned faltering companies into wildly successful ones. Applying Conscious Communication shifts the entire culture of an organization, and brings it into the 21st Century.

1. Start with what if questions, not decrees.
As a leader of any kind, regardless of your intentions, there will be a natural sense of resistance to virtually anything you have to say. That’s just the way it is. Most people are completely unaware of how much unconscious “power struggle” they’re involved in. It’s probably leftovers from a parent/child dynamic that comes up when they feel they have less power. Decrees feel like being told to “take out the trash,” or “clean your room.”

On the other hand, when people are asked questions that create the image of your desired outcome in their minds, they start seeing where you want to go. (more…)

What’s Conscious Communication Got To Do With You?

ianb — Sun, 06 Dec 2009 08:35:22 +0000

One Root - a Million Dandelions
Conscious Communication has covered areas from the philosophical to nuts and bolts communication practices. We’ve highlighted inroads to personal development and more effective management and leadership. Why? All of these areas rely on communication. Whatever we do to improve our communication improves virtually every other area of our lives. The more consciousness and awareness we bring to our communication, the more conscious and aware we become as people. Again, you may ask why. Why is this desirable?

Virtually every mistake we make in our lives and businesses can be traced back to a lack or lapse of this awareness. On the other side, we can give credit for virtually every success (more…)

What’s Stopping You?

ianb — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 22:46:02 +0000

The Self-Limiting Story
Many of my previous chronicles have addressed “liberation,” or a sense of freedom as a desired outcome. “Freedom is good, lack of freedom is bad” seems to be a pretty obvious axiom. At the very least, having more options is a better position to be in.

Yet something inside us holds back. (more…)